Loving_My_Firefighter

I'm new at this but figured I would give it a shot

Sorry it’s rather long,but here is my story …

I met my husband through my best friend at her birthday party. He is her brother. From the day we started dating I got along with his family they loved me I loved them and they accepted me. We got married on June 26 th and in July found out we were expecting our first child. Throughout all of this everything remained the same up until around my 8 th month. My mother in law called and wanted to borrow some money and we told her we had no extra money that we had just purchased some big items for the baby and she replied with “ Our child did not need to have the best of everything and we shouldn’t waste our money. That was the first unnecessary comment she had ever made so I brushed it off and moved on. Everything remained the same up until my daughter was 5 weeks old. My husband called his mother and asked her if she would come to our house and watch our daughter so we could go out to dinner. She came up to watch her and being the first time away from my daughter I text my mother in law to see how everything was and she replied with “don’t worry about it just enjoy yourself”. So after we finish dinner and return home I pick my Daughter up and she is hot to the touch not warm but hot. I asked how long she had had a fever and she said she never noticed. The next couple hours my husband and I try everything to try to get her fever to break and it just wouldn’t. We take my daughter to the ER and she is admitted with a temp of 104. After a week in the hospital they tell us that my daughter had a bladder infection her kidneys were swollen with excessive fluid buildup around them and they think it’s because of issues with her bladder. That’s all we were told till we went to see a urologist. A couple days after my daughter was released from the hospital I took her to see my husband’s grandparents and while Grandma and I were sitting at the table talking Mother in law walks in. Grandma asked me what exactly was wrong with my Daughter and before I could say anything mother in law chimes in and says “well Dee had a bladder infection while she was pregnant and she gave it to the baby.” Mind you Mother in law was only told what we told her and like I stated earlier wasn’t much because we haven’t seen the urologist yet to know anything. I was so shocked at the words that came from her mouth and hurt I sat at the table with tears going down my cheeks at the thought someone would say in front of me my child was sick because of me. His Grandma put her arm around me and told me it would be okay while mother in law just got up and left. I went home and told my husband what was said and he called his mother and told her that it wasn’t my fault that this happened to our daughter and not to bring it up again. Over the next month I heard it from her 5 more times.

After that I didn’t really talk to my mother in law much and she asked me if I had any upcoming plans and me being oblivious to what was going to happen told her I was planning a little vacation in August when my Husband had a week off from the fire dept.. I told her how excited I was about it because ever since we had been together we never went anywhere that was just us we always went with friends or something like that. About a week later my husband comes home from work and tells me that his mom wanted to go to Texas and see her family and wanted us to go to because she feels her family needs to meet our daughter and my husband told his mom that we would go. I tell my husband I was already planning something and that I didn’t want to go all the way to Texas I’m not a big traveler and the furthest I have ever been away from home was 8 hours away I don’t like being far away from home. He told his mother who then made him feel bad saying her parent weren’t well and they deserved the right to meet our daughter before anything happened to them and on and on. So my Husband comes to me and says he really wanted to go and visit because he hasn’t seen his mom’s family in years. I gave in and said fine we will go but I want to fly there because 5 hours on a plane would be a lot easier on our 5 month old daughter than the 27 hour drive. He tells his mom and she flips out saying how dare I bring something like that up it would be so expensive and she don’t have that kind of money. So I suggest that we wait until a later date when it wouldn’t be as big a deal . Once again how dare I suggest such a thing? So when august rolls around we pack everything up into our truck and drive straight through 27 hours to Texas. When we arrive at Mother in laws parents’ house and we get to our room my poor daughter is so sore from sitting in her car seat for 27 hours she cries for an hour. Mother in law comes into our room and asks if we want her to take our daughter and I said no she is fine she just hurts like I said the drive would be rough on her. Mother in law then says that “it has nothing to do with that. She was upset because I was upset over the whole trip.” To which I say I’m not upset if anything I’m happy to finally be here and not still sitting in the truck. Our second day there I get a call that my grandfather was diagnosed with cancer. This man he raised me my whole life and I’m a wreck and I tell my husband I want to go home and be with my grandfather. Mother in law gets so upset and says I ruined the whole trip and I did it all on purpose because I was mad I didn’t get my way.

After we get back from Texas mother in law discovers facebook and adds me. I add her because I didn’t want to cause problems with my husband. For two weeks everything I post she has a smart A$$ comment for it. I decided I had enough and that there were places where family doesn’t need to be and facebook was one of them so I un friend her. The next day she calls my husband crying because she wasn’t my friend and I tell my husband I’m sorry but It’s my page and I don’t want her on it and my husband gets mad at me and doesn’t talk to me for 2 days (childish I know). When my husband finally does talk to me he tells me I have to talk to his mother and fixthis because he wants his family to get along. I told my husband that his mother says some pretty cruel things sometimes and that everything is always my fault when it comes to her even if I’m totally clueless of what she is talking about it’s still my fault. That she is his mother he needed to be the one to talk to her. Husband never did talk to mother about it.

A little while after all this happened every time I get on my facebook I have a new friend request from mother in law. After about a week of this I send mother in law a message and I say that it wasn’t an accident that she got deleted off of my facebook she had said some nasty things about me ,hurt my feelings,and made me cry. To which she wrote me back and said she never wanted to be my friend on facebook it was just a joke,if she hurt my feeling and made me cry that is just something I will have to get over cause she never said anything hurtful to me,it’s a sham I had to act the way I was because I was forcing my Husband to chose sides. And told me to delete her family off of my facebook which I did . I then wrote her back and said sending request after request as a joke was very childish on her part .That I never told my husband he had to take sides and he was a grown man and could make that decision on his own,That she had said hurtful things in front of my husband and grandmother but if it made her feel better to deny it then go ahead and do so. I finished up saying I was done trying to make things work with her and I don’t need people who don’t try to fixtheir problems and instead start them and until she could treat me like and adult and show me some respect she was no longer welcome in my home and I didn’t need to hear from her anymore.

From that day on me and my mother in law have not spoken and things have been way more peaceful around my house. My Mother in law says that I have overreacted. Was I wrong?

Oh let me add that my husband just told me yesterday that he talked to Mother in law and Herself,Sister in law,and Brother in law are going to fly down to Texas in July to see her family. Imagine That.