sykadelic

POSTED 18 JUN 2011 - from FFH page

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There are days when I forget that I have ILs. And, then, there are days when I can't ignore that I do.

I've never failed to be nice to them. If I run into MIL, I say, "Hi," because I don't want to be rude (but, I don't seek her out). Little SIL needed to borrow my iPod cable, and, though I haven't heard from her in close to a year, I agreed when she texted asking to borrow it. She had FIL return it. She couldn't even be bothered delivering it herself. I should mention that we live around 5 blocks away from them. It's less than a 1 minute drive, and maybe a 5-10 minute walk, depending on your gait. Older SIL is graduating from college. So, again, although I am only texted when she wants something (and, she can't get a hold of DH), I sent her a text congratulating her.

FIL is nice enough, but he doesn't really talk to me. Could be shyness, could be that he doesn't know what to say. But, that hurts a bit, as well.

I came to the realization that my interaction with my MIL and SILs is like dealing with the snooty popular kids in high school. I feel anxious just dealing with them: knowing that my every move is judged; that I'm talked about as soon as I leave; and that they think they're better than me/us at anything they do. But, that's only when dealing with them. The rest of the time, I feel like that puppy dog that gets kicked for no reason. I tried hard to be nice when dealing with them, and I just feel betrayed by being ignored.

I used to think about what it would be like when I moved here with my husband and got married. I actually recall thinking about how little SIL and I might go to movies, occasionally (big SIL, whom she likes to spend time with, is several states away), or just spend time together chatting and what not. That was stupid, now that I think about it and our situation as it is now.

I feel very brokenhearted about it all. The only good thing is that DH knows, and agrees, with how I feel about MIL and little SIL. He hates MIL more than I do. But, he still thinks older SIL is nice (she's not my kind of people - she's vapid).

I don't regret marrying DH, because I love him, and he's great. But, I do often wish my family was here. It would certainly take the edge off.

I don't suppose there's any real point to this, except to vent about how bad I feel, some days, to have in-laws that couldn't give two-sh!ts that I'm alive. I know it could be worse. I know they could be meddling. I know my DH could be on their side and not mine. But, it doesn't mean that I don't wish that I had that family connection with the only "family" I have in thousands of miles.

Signed - Brokenhearted

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