Need help how to navigate DIL relationship.

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Quote Originally Posted by Jazzy View Post
Hi me again
Trying to find out where I'm going wrong here.
I asked my DIL where did she learn English? This is after knowing her for 3 years.
She speaks fluent English & Mandarin. I'm impressed with people who are bilingual.
I've learnt basic Mandarin greetings to be able to acknowledge her parents national language & foster communication.
As her parents are planning to live here for 12 months, I asked if her parents were going to learn some English.
Didn't ask on the same day but....
DIL thought I was talking down to Chinese people by asking these questions & being judgemental.
In my defence if I was living in Beijing & spoke fluent Mandarin & someone asked me where I learnt the language, I wouldn't feel they were talking down to me, simply asking question & showing interest in me?
Obviously people are on different pages, ok let me have your opinions.

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  1. Jazzy's Avatar
    Thanks for feedback. I do think Dil is looking to be offended so she can tell my son. Do you think this is mirroring relationship with her father. You find something to hurt him (& son has said its breaking his heart) argue about it & he has to reaffirm his love commitment to her.
    I thought communication was two way street so we can understand each other better give & take on both sides. Apologies if some of post is duplicated.
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