>I would say sure, why not? She's the only one in the family
>that I don't like.
>
>
>
>And she'd be dead. So no big deal, other than wanting to throw
>in the first (and last) shovel full. I'd just have to control
>my emotions. The correct way to act would be totally neutral.
> Tears always show in my eyes involuntarily, no matter what
>feelings I have for the deceased. And I really don't like
>crocodile tears from anybody including myself. With people in
>the family having a good idea how I feel, it would be bad for
>DH for me to be there boo-hoo'ing. And also to hold back from
>grinning or singing Ding Dong the Witch is Dead.
>


I didn't realize we could still post to this. When I posted this message, it was less than a month before MIL really did die, much to my surprise. I thought she was to mean to go...
Interestingly, a lot of what I said I would do happened, a lot of what I feared did not. I went, wore the famous Christmas "PEACE and JOY" undies, but other than that was pretty much emotionless. I said for the record here, that I feared grinning or crying during the event, both which would be inappropriate. In reality, though there was a certain "peace", I felt totally emotionless during the actual funeral. It was total detachment. At most memorable point to me during the service, I looked up at the casket sitting in the front of the funeral home and thought "She's in there, it's over." in a very unemotional sort of way.

The rest of the ILs don't bother me one way or the other. I've always been pretty neutral on them, so the whole experince was OK, since MIL was not there in a way to bother me.

But I did NOT, shovel any of the dirt, put a stake through her heart, dance on her grave, etc. The only "bad" thing I did was the underwear thing and only one person who knows me knows about that. She isn't family and she won't tell!

>
>
>-------------------
>CO #18
>Avenger #54
>
>Last time I spoke directly to MIL: May 7, 2003

^^^^^ And I never spoke to her again! ^^^^

-------------------
MIL Survivor: NOW MIL_LESS TOO!!

CO #18
Avenger #54