You've heard it a million times before, but the old saying is true: "Your mother knows how to push all your buttons, because she's the one who installed them."

It's HARD to break free, even if you believe in your heart of hearts that she's a soul-sucking demon. Because she's also your mom.

I think one of the reasons it's so tough to disengage from an abusive mother is that if you say "She's a terrible person and I hate her", there's a small part of you that must think, "Well, then **I** must be terrible, too, since I came from her. I'm 50% my mother, so what does that say about ME?"

The answer, I've come to believe, is that you aren't 50% your mother and 50% your father. At best, parents impart a lot of positive things to their kids. At worst, they're skin donors.

She may have given you your skin, but your soul is yours and yours alone. Nobody else owns that (your soul, your essense, your core, whatever you want to call it), and nobody else can touch it.