FMIL is CRAZY! When we were first engaged, she and her DH tried to move in with us. In less than two months, it just wasn't working out and we had to ask them to leave. Of course, I took all the blame for it, because her child would never do something so awful. In addition to creating a scene in our neighborhood, she slapped on some truly painful and uncalled-for insults that weren't relevant to the situation.

For the past two years she has maintained a relationship with DH's ex-GF, her son, and the new live-in BF. None of these people are related to her. The child was not even my DF's child! She's neglected to talk to us, except for a couple of rare occasions.

She sent a letter to our house because my DF was angry that she is maintaining a relationship with his ex. Understandably, he is very upset and feels that his own mother is choosing a relationship with his ex over a relationship with him. The two-page letter described how he commented that it was the principle of the whole situation of her being friends with them, and it being inappropriate. She went on to ask him where the principle was in breaking up with his high school sweetheart, the ex-GF who had a child from a previous marriage. She began the letter trying to guilt my DF. She then went on to say that she doesn't believe that it was him doing all of the awful things, and that she doesn't think this marriage would be a good idea. She said that the ex-GF's child traveled to spend the previous summer with her and her husband. The ex-GF and her son are their rocks, and they would never turn away from that special friendship.

It gets better: DF's half-sister is getting married next spring, and the ex-GF and her kid are going to stay with my future ILs, and the kid (OF NO RELATION TO THIS FAMILY) is going to be part of the ceremony. She commented that this shows the ex-GF's maturity to put differences with my DF aside for one day to make that day special for someone else.

They are also maintaining a friendship with the ex-GF's new live-in BF. The ex needs to be more of a mother and slow it down with all of the live-in BFs. I can't help but wonder what's the matter with her as well. How do you convince your current BF to go hang out with your ex-BF's family? They are not related in any way! The new BF wasn't like "Hmm, that's a little weird. I can understand if it was the child's grandparents, but you aren't related to these people at all ..."

What gets better is that the child calls my DF's mother and stepfather "Grandpa and Grandma", and MIL convinced my DF to call his step-dad "Dad" from the time he was about 6. This created a lot of tension with his real father. My parents are still together, and in my family we only call people Mom and Dad if they really are mom and dad, or if they're in a situation where they were raised by a parent's new spouse and the actual parent was absent from their life.

This woman really needs to see a psychologist. I think she needs to talk out some inner issues that she has. This has been really painful and hard on DF and me. It has, however, shown me never to take for granted both the amazing family that I have, and my future FIL and his side of the family, that I am so blessed to be marrying into.

FFIL is a great guy! He is energetic and fun. He is responsible and a very motivating person to be around. He's the perfect combination of tough and sentimental. His wife is a wonderful woman who is one of the most selfless people I've ever met. The grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins - EVERYONE from that side of the family, are so friendly and warm and easygoing.

Signed - Never To Take For Granted